6 Ways to deal with a woman hitting on your man
Do you agree that if something angers you it conquers you? This is a truth stated by 20th century Australian nurse Elizabeth Kenny.
Still, when something important is at stake, how does one react without letting anger dominate? Also, without selling out one’s values? Nobody wants to be the insecure girlfriend or wife, nor the pushover. We are defined by how we behave in all situations of life.
Here are some ideas for what you might do when other women trespass:
- Ignore the situation only if it truly does not bother you. Don’t play cool if you don’t feel cool about it, don’t bury your head in the sand.
- Clarify the circumstances. Make sure that a situation actually exists and it’s not just something you misperceived. More so if it’s something you have not personally witnessed.
- Confront your feelings. It might seem counterintuitive to focus on yourself. However, in the long run, being self-aware has relevance for yourself and for your relationship. Find out what this situation means for you. Does it bring to light some hidden insecurities? Do you link it with something outside your relationship? Do you see it as a sign of disrespect? All in all, you have to be able to control your own trust or jealousy issues.
- Confide in your man. The person who should be sending rejection signals is the one that receives attention. Let him know that it bothers you, especially when he reacts in a way that you don’t like. Never approach him in a controlling manner, though. He shouldn’t have to feel that his freedom is at stake.
If your man is the one enabling flirtation, he might not appreciate your relationship that much. Or, he might fight personal insecurities by seeking attention. Still, he might view it as meaningless fun. Make sure you are clear about what’s going on.
You should find a balance between accepting people for who they are, living by your own standards, and not getting up in details.
- Defuse the situation and laugh it off. When you know your man’s opinion about flirting, it will be easier to witness it in a detached and amused manner. Or to hear him tell you about such flirts.
Knowing that he is not bothered if you intervene, you could start flirting with him also. Or state your position in a classy way by placing your hand on his shoulder or hand, or by giving him a kiss.
- Get his attention by spicing up your love life. Stressing that essentially another person’s flirts have nothing to do with you, it is your job to keep your man interested in you. It is never ok to let your body go or dress sloppy. To have the best relationship make yourself as attractive as you can be and improve your sex life with costumes, porn videos or sex toys.