Every once in a while my wife and I spend a couple of nights in a hotel, just the two of us, solely for the purpose of having some quality alone and play time.
The hotels we choose are cheap and cheerful, often situated just off motorways in service stations. They are transient, anonymous hotels, frequented by business travellers or short stay guests. They have no communal areas, no bars or restaurants where guests may engage with other guests. They are basic but provide us with everything we need for an extended period of play. It feels dirty and decadent being in these hotels, an indulgence of perversion which I sometimes wonder how many other couples would consider as an option. My guess would be not many but perhaps I’m wrong.
I don’t mention these ‘dirty weekends’ to colleagues or family or most of our friends, I’m not sure they’d understand. They’d ask questions like what did we do, or what sights did we see and the answers may not be appreciated because we don’t see anything except the walls of our room and although we ‘do’ a variety of things none of it is suitable for idle office chat. I can’t imagine telling many people that no the beautiful cathedral in that particular city did not merit our attention as there was no time to spare between beatings and fucking and general debauchery. But my silence also adds to the whole feeling of a dirty weekend, the secrecy of two days dedicated to kinky sex adds extra excitement both before and after the event.
We are becoming very proficient at packing for our excursions, we take whatever we need which includes a cool box, food, plates, cutlery, napkins, tea/coffee and our own favourite cups. We have learned from experience, and do as much as we can to make sure the hotel room is warm, cosy and a good place to play. There is of course a bag of toys, a variety of impact instruments, rope, cuffs and cocks. There is also usually some specific requests by me for outfits to be taken by my wife. We provide for ourselves whatever these basic hotels do not have, and take full advantage of what they do.
When we arrive the first thing I do is put the ‘Do not disturb’ sign on the door which feels like an affirmation of the playtime to come and it isn’t just directed at the hotel staff. It’s a plea to the universe to leave us alone, just for 36 short hours, to unwind and reconnect on a very, very, primal level. We unpack, relax and allow the pressures of everyday life to ebb away in favour of our own private bubble. I spend some time taking in my surroundings and thinking through my preliminary plans and making sure everything I want to do will work. Hotel rooms while generally the same are still individual and I may need to adjust some ideas to fit our surroundings. I do like the challenge of this and over the months have added some items to my collection which are particularly useful in hotels.
At some point, usually the following morning, we will pay a visit to the adjoining service station area for a coffee and the opportunity to stock up on supplies of food. Service stations are fascinating places and provide great opportunities for people watching. I always wonder at the stories behind these travellers, where are they going or where have they come from. Who are their companions? Are they perhaps, like us, having a naughty and exciting time away from home? Are they kinky, queer, perverted? Are they wishing they could be?
I enjoy taking time with our play sessions, I don’t want to hurry them or squeeze them in at the end of a tiring day. I’m not saying we only ever play at our hotels but at home playtime is shorter and doesn’t allow for periods of play interspersed with periods of care followed by more play etc. The hotel trips do allow time for this, I can start slow and build, indulge myself in several fantasies and spend a long time nurturing my wife into a deeper sub space than normal. We can engage in a far more complicated and fulfilling dom/sub, butch/femme power exchange than we can at home. It also gives us the opportunity to explore new desires, experiment, push our boundaries and discover additional kinks.
Our trips are important to us on many levels but mainly I think because of the opportunity for uninterrupted communication. We talk, a lot, about everything and anything but as well as that there is the physical communication. Being able to indulge our passion both for each other and for BDSM, in peace, with no distractions is an absolute joy. And it is a great healer for the stresses which life throws at us. It allows us the time to be complete in our communication and connection with each other over an extended period of time which we all know is precious. It is all about creating and maintaining an intimate, private space where we can communicate physically in our own ways while being true to ourselves.
We are very good at building our own private world when we stay in hotels, a world where time becomes (almost) meaningless. A world where the only things that really matter are what is going on inside the four walls of our room. The hotels are disassociated from ‘real life’, they are unfamiliar, hold no reminders or distractions, even those we have been to more than once only bring memories of previous visits. It’s intoxicating, it’s fantastic, it’s incredibly sexy. So if you ever have the opportunity to lock yourself away with your loved one for a dirty weekend I highly recommend you do it, and then do it again!