Thoughts about porn

Monday, February 28, 2011
By Holden
I recently encountered some negative reaction to feminist/queer porn and it got me thinking. The people who I encountered seemed to be firmly of the opinion that all porn is wrong and against feminist principles.

Firstly I admit this is not a topic I know a massive amount about so these are just personal observations. I have seen porn, both mainstream and queer. I would also include the written word in this which means not only have I read porn but l’ve also written it. But my knowledge ends there, I don’t know about the theories or arguments. I’m simply talking about my gut reaction to the negativity I encountered.

I started writing porn and blogging about sex because it felt like a good thing to do. I felt like I was reclaiming something that had been squashed in me and I still feel that way. Being open about sex, for me, is positive even if it’s sometimes hard. So I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that not everyone thinks like that.

I realise that for a very long time porn has been the domain of men, both in production and viewing. I also know that there is more ‘bad’ porn out there than good. Both of these facts make me think that women making porn for women or queers making porn for queers can only be a good thing. If it’s done right and fairly so everyone gets paid properly etc then that can only help change the industry as a whole. I know one of the arguments against this might be that it’s only because of the history of porn that women think they should re-claim it. Another may be why make porn in the first place.

Porn will not go away, it’s been around for a very long time and so far no amount of opposition to it has changed that. Regardless of where that opposition has come from. Changing it from the inside seems to me a more viable option. Remaking and remarking the boundaries of porn to suit all types of people and all genders will make it more accessible. In this way porn in all its forms will become more inclusive and it will dilute and erode some of the existing negative aspects. In other words the industry itself will need to change to reflect new and growing markets. Porn which is negative for women and queers will have less impact.

I also feel that feminist or queer made porn is about women and queers claiming sex and sexuality, claiming their right to sex and sexuality. Sex is natural. Desire is natural. Being turned on is natural. What isn’t natural is suppressing those things. Women and queers have every right to be as perverse as anyone else. If that means watching, wanting and making porn then I say go for it.

I want women and queers to feel empowered to make choices regardless of what they might be. If those choices involve viewing, writing or making the kind of porn they like then I don’t see how that harms others. I know this might be a simplistic view, that I’m not taking into account all the history and struggle of feminism. But maybe we need to see things simply sometimes, maybe it makes them clearer.

The other point I want to make is that I’m old enough and ugly enough to make my own decisions. If anyone tells me what is good or bad for me then that feels like oppression. It particularly feels like oppression when those telling me what to do are supposed to be on my side. So I won’t be told that all porn is bad because I don’t think it is.

I’m coming at this from the angle of someone who was ambivalent or negative about sex for a long times. For me being positive about sex is a revelation, it’s liberating and it’s bloody good fun. I want everyone to feel like that.

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2 Responses to “Thoughts about porn”

  1. Awesome post Holden! I totally agree with your argument, and that was totally the way I felt when my mother and her “feminist” friends told me porn was a bad thing. I totally think that women and queers reclaiming their sexuality through their own unique perspective and expression has made changes in the industry, and will continue to do so.

    I also like that you have expressed this in a simple way, from your own opinion, because no-one should be able to try to push on us what they think is right for us. And, opinions are just as valid as any academic argument.

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  2. [...] Honesty and Courtesy #LadyPornDay Master and Slave? My Experiences with Porn Question Month: #1 Thoughts on Porn by Holden What if His Is Much Larger Than Mine? – His & Hers Perspectives on Cock Size And Swinging Wet [...]

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About Domina

Domina Doll is a freelance sex writer, sexpert, and sex toy diva as well as an aspiring Passion & Pleasure Coach certified in Sex Toys and G-spot, as well as Women's Sexuality from Loveology. She has dabbled as a fetish photographer, sex toy peddler, and jill of all trades, but her passion is teaching others about positive sexuality, intimacy and how to have passion-filled relationships.

Her work has been published in several sex related magazines including Women's Health, Lover Magazine, Whiplash!, SMUT, Good Vibes, Carnal Nation, SexLifeCanada and Blog Her (Sex). She is also the go to sexpert gal at AllExperts.com, where she answers questions about sex toys and sexuality in general. Domina has also ghostwritten sexpert e-books as well as her own sex guides including: "Jillin' Off: A Girl's Guide to Solo Sex". She is currently the sex toy reviewer for Sexpert.com by Dr. Ava Cadell.

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